Showing posts with label deer. Show all posts
Showing posts with label deer. Show all posts

Monday, January 11, 2016

The Smug Hunter's Field Guide

See, the deal with my particular self-hatred is, I have BEEN clingy (more on this later), and I talk too much, and these are things I've hated about myself. So as my potential suitor, YOU can't be clingy and talk too much, because I will hate it even more in you.

I am attracted to guys who are...not unavailable, per se (though I've clearly been there). But definitely less emotive than I am.

I'm like a skittish baby deer, and if I feel like you're coming on too strong, I'm taking my fluffy ass back into the wild. None of my meat for you.

...OK, wait, I lost control of the deer metaphor.

Don't be clingy, is my point. Once you've pushed me to thinking "OMG, PLEASE STOP TALKING," we're probably done.