Move along, Family, nothing to see here...

One of the worst things about having my whole family on my personal Facebook is that, in the past 24 hours, at least one of them has likely seen me "like" four different wineries, the Philly chapter of a suicide prevention organization, multiple rape counseling centers, and a national association for depression and mood disorders.

Um...it's research?

Honestly, I just want to tour the wineries; I'm doing a 5K to support the suicide prevention group because I think it's an important cause; I'm looking for a job at the counseling centers; and...well, I'm a depraved bastard who's interested in mood disorders. *shrug* Y'all raised me.

Gonna take it right into my danger zone...

Another fun and informative class at Kink Shoppe with Yvette St. James -- toys and apps and lubes, oh my! More classes to come! (Heh.)

Also, many thanks to the Kink staff for filling me in (tee hee) on the features of my next life investment...

 

A vast improvement on the scientific method

One of my OkCupid matches is a guy whose username is 12inchistoobig.* His profile says he chose the name because yes, it IS, and it's been an issue for him sexually when the woman can't take it. So he wants to warn us villagers up front.

He says he'll prove he's actually that big, which I suppose would be a fairly straightforward Exhibit A.

But then he says, before things get too involved, he also wants proof the woman can handle it, and the proof would be "they make toys in that size." I'm not sure how that would go, exactly... Skype? FaceTime? Do you buy the toy, or is it a BYOBC situation?** If I'm comfortable enough to try a toy in your presence, we've gotten pretty close, so I should probably just try your dick, no?

Now, none of MY toys are that big -- standard size gets the job done just fine.

So, no, Dirk Diggler, I don't know if I COULD handle it, but...I mean...I feel like we should try. For research. I like science. Do you like science? We should science.

P.S. I'm...98% sure he's full of shit. I just like to write long penis posts. 

*Not his real username.
** There's a "five-dollar footlong" joke there somewhere, but I'm tired, and Jared ruined all Subway humor.

As if "Fuller House" weren't appalling enough...

Eeeeewwwwwww!

At the same time...respect... 

Via Decider:  

P.S. I saw a link for a porn parody of this over the weekend, but could not bring myself to click to watch Fuller Holes, even under the guise of "research."